sick sadness

happiness evades me
morbid stalks me
i can no linger run from the inspiration
its in my mind, there is no escaping
it watches, pierces, stabs and sings.
there is no hiding.
id like to say i am haunted,
but i think i enjoy this morbid madness..
if one can be happy-being lonely.
then why deprive me of this sick sadness?
it never stops.
it never sinks.
though no longer dying
i find untrying.
i am still
be still
basking it, breathing it.
dont ever let go.
i cant see it leaving,
i cant.
it stays.
let me sing.


i dont need your help.
~gabe~