I like to dance in the rain
it takes away the pain
the sadness of the cows
as they lose there milk
like blood stained life
and blood stained silk
like an indian boy dancing in the firelight
like a white boy dancing for spite
and like the white girl dancing because she is a slut
ohhhhhhhh wut?
DAN?

sick sadness

happiness evades me
morbid stalks me
i can no linger run from the inspiration
its in my mind, there is no escaping
it watches, pierces, stabs and sings.
there is no hiding.
id like to say i am haunted,
but i think i enjoy this morbid madness..
if one can be happy-being lonely.
then why deprive me of this sick sadness?
it never stops.
it never sinks.
though no longer dying
i find untrying.
i am still
be still
basking it, breathing it.
dont ever let go.
i cant see it leaving,
i cant.
it stays.
let me sing.


i dont need your help.
~gabe~

Raging Hormones

I still have bruises
From the first time you touched me
I hate myself when you're around
this isn't me this isn't me
this isn't me
Leave. me. be.


This can't be love.
It isn't
how it's supposed to be

-china-

oh my days
oh my months
oh my years
oh my life
thank you
~crouching tiger hidden dragon~

Angel.of.Death

Sweet angel of death, you stay in my mind
I live you, i breath you, you're so hard to find.
I'm pushing and pulling, and calling your name,
I dream of your voice but my dreams are the same.
Wont you come, and stay with me now?
Can you see, I've made my death vow?
There is no way out, and no way in.
I'm stuck in the middle, you make my heart spin.
I'm waiting, I'm shaking, please hear my cry.
With or without you, i know i shall die.
But right now, my heart is at the edge of the mountain
Without you mine eyes spring tears like a fountain.
It is do or die, or replace or with and.
And you do and you die,
Please, just hold my hand.
Is it truly the angel of death that i seek?
Or the love I have lost,
And my eyes sneak a peak.
Was it love that I lost?
Or just lust that I loved?
I'm confused, I'm bruised, I feel used and abused
Where are you now?
~gabe~

why?

my tears soak the bandana thats covering my face
my eyes are so blurred i cant see you hating me
Why?
i dont know why?
i cant just die?
die?
why?
DAN?

love of me

sweet sinful love of me
i see you live
i see me breathe.
i am here, i notice me
do you?
i am beautiful.
please notice me
look at me
touch me
feel me,
i do where are you?
the beauty that lives upon this skin
waits for love
waits for you
it is no longer satisfied with the love i cannot bring
this pain is too deep
this love wont last if you dont love
~gabe~

tearful

tears fill my eyes
im an emotional reck
don't be a hater
the tear will fall
just one of many that have washed my face of its misery
each tear that falls is like droplets of acid upon my heart
tears fill my eyes
it burns!?
~crouching tiger hidden dragon~

unbeauty

I wear a bandana to cover my face because im not beautiful

I sit in the corner and you wont notice me there

you cant feel feelings you have to live them

you cant live them if your dead

i cant die in a corner............

you wont notice me die......

am i still not beautiful???

to you??

Dan?

This One's for You, Modern World

Why are you blaming me?
It’s your fault,
You made me.
I’m not a child covered in finger paints
this mess won’t just rub off.

You taught me how to walk,
to talk.
I’m so mortified
Because I don’t remember
How not to be your puppet

Don’t make me put my mask back on
It doesn’t fit right
Please.
I know what’s under is hideous,
But you’re clutching me too tight

“Damn kids”
You spit
But can’t you see
(silly)
We’re your kids

-china-

certificate of normalacy

Someday

when i am older

you will regret it

you will see that i grew up corrupt

Because of selfishness

because of greed

you ruined what i had

you took what dignity i possesed

you stripped my mind of it's sanity

Someday

when i get oloder

you will regret it

i wont try to kill you

i've thought of it

but my pride will hold me together

for a while

the day you break this family apart

will be your last

listen closly

Leave!

Go!

i've wasted too much time on a twisted freak

like you

~Crouching tiger hidden dragon~

aching emotion

It’s a sorrowful song an aching emotion
Not something I desired
This lust I’ve acquired,
I know wont leave me by choice.
Though my mind knows, you’ll not return to me
I whisper, but can you hear my plea?
I strive, to hear your voice
This lust I have acquired, will leave me not by choice
My heart still dreams,
My eyes still seek.
And every time a desperate peek,
My fingers remember, o so well,
The feeling of your hair,
Soft between my fingertips
It seems so cruel, unfair.
For though you barely notice me
I’ll see you now and then.
my heart still dies,
My eye still crys
I know you’ll not return.
It’s a sorrowful song,
I sing of it often
But it wont leave by choice
~gabe~

Terified is the state of mindwhen you find out youve been left behind
feel the pain and aim to please7 sins above your now down on your knees
walk alone move up head back
stand tall while you wonder what it took to fall
Twisted senses flow through my black veins
Now watch the sky fall

reap the glory death is on your back
feel the hate i place inside
rise up and seize the day
intervene with all your pride
.....now im walking dead

I want you to feel it
feel the misery i've known
and i want you to take me
take me far away from here
desolet and empty is the entity i fear
.......Now im walking dead

reap the glory death is on your back
feel the hate i place inside
rise up and seize the day
intervene with all your pride
....now im walking dead

YEARN

The way the moon looks tonight (makes me want to fall in love)

If I was Garfeild, you'd be my lasaugna-

I HEART YOU

I can't be by myself any longer (i've learned blood doesn't wash out with soap)

TAKE ME AWAY

whisper sweet nothings in my ears

Every second . . . .

. . . . . . . . . away from you is like an episode of jepordy in slow motion

-china-

my life story (sad story)

I am sheilded by my wall
No one, no words, no force
can break through
I built it to protect me from you... ...from me
It moves where i move
Store, bed, practice
Some days it breaks down
others it stands tall
the wall is both my friend and foe
helping me pass the days
But constricting me to myself
i scratch each day into the wall
counting until the day it falls down
then the
words, people, force, you, can touch me
But i wll face them with my face, no wall, no sheild
The scars will bear my trails and triumphs
together with the help of the man in the clouds
my trials are but a brittle leaf to be
squished under my foot

~Crouching tiger hidden dragon~

Love.Hate.

Love.

Adore, Worship,

Respect, Admire, Value,

You.

Despise, Scorn, Abhor,

Detest, Loathe,

Hate.

-Michaelangelo-

Is there no love in this world

i don't like to sing

do you care?

NO
i can't love

do you care?

NO
i am a drug addict

do you care?

NO
i cry myself to sleep

Do you care?

NO
your the log i must carry

do you care?

NO
is there no love in this world?

~Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon~

Our Love

Love is like the dark waters of the ocean drowning you
You can’t escape the grasp around your neck
Like the noose
That will be my comfort tonight
When I am without you I can breathe
I feel constricted
Sharp stabbing pain by my heart lets me known your there
Kill me know so I don’t need to feel the pain
The wretched wretched dark evil love enriched pain

~Crouching tiger Hidden dragon~

BABY! (My Heart to You)

My heart bleeds for you
BABY
my eyes cry for you
BABY
My tears could fill the ocean
BABY
Your hate is like a large icesicle stabbed through my knee
BABY
OHOHOHOHOHH
BABY BABY
WHY?????
my hearts still bleeding
i hope it gets better
BABY BABY
You are like an angel and i am like a dog
our children would be angel dogs
BABY
But you wouldnt let me get that far
and it burned me like a sparkler shoved through my fist
and my fist was clenched as i punched the wall in anger when you left
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
BABY

the sound of life

Crack

That’s the sound of my life ripping apart

Craaak

like the sound of an ox's cry

You cannot forget the sound

Craaaaaak

it will burn in your soul forever

burn

aargh my heart

contantly beating pumping

unfortuantly

keeping me alive

just like that weeping ox

CRACK

contsantly reminding

sometimes it get so loud

so loud you cant ignore

and you wish you were that weeping ox

so that you could no longer hear the

CRACKKK

of your life

slowly burning out.

-michaelangelo-

I Can See You

Hello Gorgeous
I can see you
Cheryl Windhorst
Doing the robot
Wishing you were in
A disco club
Don’t ever
Stop
dancing

-china-

dance is my joy

Dance, Dance, Dance
always always dance
if you dont dance
dance dance dance
i will dance
dance dance dance
an arrow through your back
so dance dance dance
if you value your life
Always always dance
dance dance dance
dance dance dance
naked in france
jump and prance
lose those pants
dance dance dance
Dan?